Transforming relationship break ups and breakdowns into breakthroughs
Do I need a specialist divorce solicitor?
Is there a divorce solicitor near me?
Is there a divorce solicitor for men?
How much will a divorce cost me?
These are frequently asked questions when it comes to divorce advice for men.
I can't tell you what is best for you so I asked a family law specialist, just for you.
The fact is, experienced family lawyers are experts and in the same way that you would see a doctor, dentist, vet or accountant for expert advice you should also consider speaking with a family lawyer if you are facing divorce. The law is a strange and complex land and some people need an expert guide to navigate its hills and valleys in one piece.
Yes it will cost you, but even if the separation or divorce is amicable you will want to make sure that your interests are completely protected and also that all paperwork is in order now to protect you later.
For example, I have worked with clients who have done a “DIY” divorce. They have got as far as applying for decree nisi only to find that the application is rejected because there was an error in the Petition.
This can be costly, frustrating and time consuming – the Petition document may need to be amended and then would have to be re-served on your ex-partner. If you have the time to research and learn more about the process you might find a d.i.y. divorce the best solution for you, but you may hit a few hurdles along the way.
Some solicitors will offer a “document checking” service which will be a much cheaper approach. You can ask for the advice, have your documents quality checked so that the court will accept them, but you will be doing the leg work, not the solicitor.
Similarly even if you have reached a financial settlement with the other party it is always worth running this by a solicitor to ensure you haven’t missed anything and also getting it drawn up into a proper agreement/order so that it represents a full and final settlement and you are protected.
The perception is often that solicitors increase costs rather than seek to limit them. As with any trade or profession there are some unscrupulous solicitors but most family solicitors will seek to protect your interests in the most cost effective way.
If your divorce solicitor does this then you can make an informed decision at each stage as to what you want to do and the likely outcome and act accordingly.
Of course there will always be situations when it is difficult to limit the costs for example if the other party is difficult and unreasonable or won’t engage in the process. However you can yourself help to limit the costs. Remember:
- You are relying on your solicitor for legal advice and guidance. Do not use your solicitor as an emotional crutch. That is what coaches, counsellors and friends and family are for.
- Listen to your solicitor's advice and don’t ask them to push arguments or issues that are unreasonable. It will cost you more in the long run.
- All emails/telephone calls to your solicitor are usually chargeable even if they are routine so plan to limit your contact with your solicitor where possible. Don't be rushing to tell them about every little thing she does, no matter how infuriating it may be.
- Try and focus on the bigger issues and not the small ones
Remember, it is your divorce not your solicitors, so whilst the legal advice is available and accurate it may not suit your personal circumstances. Your future wellbeing is your responsibility. Your solicitors advice should identify the steps toward resolving any conflict now that will empower you tomorrow.
Karen Weiner is a specialist divorce and family lawyer with The Law House. With over 20 years experience Karen advises on a wide range of family law issues. Karen is a Resolution accredited specialist in the areas of complex financial and property matters and private children law issues.
You can contact Karen on 01923 521003 or firstname.lastname@example.org
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